7 Days left until I hop on a plane back to Southern California. I’m excited to come back, sad to leave, and uncertain about my future.

I’m excited to see my family and friends, sleep in a bed, have a shower that is separate from my sink, escape the humidity of Japan, eat some food that isn’t Japanese, and drive a car again.

I’m sad to leave the friends I have made here, my futon, my shower that is part of my sink, the humidity of Japan, Japanese food (although delicious, I have never eaten teriyaki chicken in Japan), and the trains.

I’m having an uncertain look on my face when I think about my future (I was trying to keep the “I’m” thing going). I don’t know how much the JET program has given me in terms of “professional development.” I was trying to write down all the things I could put on a resume that might help me in a future job and after writing down “conversational Japanese” and drawing pictures for 20 minutes I gave up. This isn’t to say the JET program hasn’t been a good thing.

The past three years have been quite simply an amazing experience. I have traveled to countries and seen things that I never would have imagined 10 years ago. I have learned a new Language. I have Learned to teach students who I had no connection to besides being there teacher. I have learned about a foreign culture, its customs, its people, and because of that I have learned more about America.

But I think the most important thing I have learned is that I truly love teaching. I love it. I love the highs, the lows, the good days and bad days. I love it because I’m helping someone. I love it because I love children. I love to see them try. And as much as I hate to see them fail, there are only a few things in this world that can light me up inside the same way as when they pick themselves up after failing and try again. I love how they see the world. I love how they make me see the world, bright and limitless.

I have always loved teaching, but these past three years I have been in a position where I wasn’t as effective as a feel I could have been. Although I have known these students for three years, I would only get to teach them 10 times a year because of our schedule. And if they were elementary school students then only 2 times a year. I think that feeling of not being able to teach these students was one of the worst feelings ever, which makes me want to be a better teacher when I get back.

I know I want to be in Education when I get back but I am still unsure of what field, level, and more importantly where I will be the most effective. Before coming to Japan I worked with Autistic children and those were some of my best days. But I also loved working at the outreach center at UCI. I really like Japanese and would love to teach it someday or have a job where I could use it. And ever since learning web “stuff” this past year I love the web, design, and I actually kind of enjoy programming. So the uncertainty I face in the months and years to come isn’t because I don’t know what I want to do. Its because I don’t know how I’m going to do all the things I want to do.